PVT. LANGER discusses last night's speech

PVT. LANGER was in attendence at last night's Presidential Address at Ft. Bragg.

A Review by Pvt. Noah Langer (Fargo, North Dakota)

The overall reception by the troops to last nights’ presidential speech was mixed.

I have to admit I was pretty pissed off that he didn’t think it was necessary to come out for an encore. We were banging on the seats and we had those little lasery things that shine up on the wall. I knew he was gonna do some of his greatest hits such as “The World Has Changed Since 9-11,” “Iraq Has Terrorists,” and some of his newer material like “Giving an End Date (Means the Terrorists Just Have to Wait.)” I was surprised there weren’t many new tracks of the rumored forthcoming album “War Is Over” like “We Got New Armor (And We Know How to Use It). I understand he also does a Banjo Trio with Cheney and Rumsfeld “Six Months, 12 Years (What’s The Difference?)”

I was really hoping he would come out with a big encore of some of his earlier more eclectic material, ya know for us, the die-hards. I was hoping he would surprise us with “A Brutal Dictator” or a good old “Axis of Evil” and the popular B-Side “Iraq is Processing Uranium,” or "Bin Ladin:Dead or Alive" (with Bon Jovi). He could have at least thrown in “The Priceless Barney Lymric”

All in all for a $120 ticket (which is equal to my weekly salary) I wasn’t very impressed. The T-Shirts were $50 a pop.