Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Back to Bargains

Now as I mentioned before My girlfriend was thrilled, after being in a Berlin for a week, over the Valentine's Flowers I got for her.. on Feb 17.

Half Price by the way... Long Stem Reds... they looked great.
She found that part very sexy.

But I think I need to send flowers again.

But in that same earlier blog I mentioned that I was thinking about Buying Gold Bars .

And then this comes out. Google will be a bargain some day too!

I don't think Google will fail... but they will have to lay off some folks. And it's sad, but they were way overpriced to begin with. As it says at bullshitjob.com...

If you can't hold your product in your hand... you have a bullshit job.

Perhaps the laid off can get a job in Marine Electronics , now that is cool shit you can hold in your hand.

Racketeering back in action!

Okay so the Supreme Court said OKAY-DOKEY for folks to start using terror tactics as part of pro-life protests. No some folks have heard me say in the past the Operation Rescue is a terror organization and should be treated as such... let's take a peek at the chart made at Religous Tolerance.com through 2004. (scroll down a bit)

That's right! the Pro-Life movement is responsible for more acts of terrorism (including Anthrax Threats) on U.S. Soil than Al-Qaeda!

What part of this is acceptable?

Also, why is Operation Rescue so happy this ban has been lifted? What do they have up their sleeves?

Also why was this unanimous?

Monday, February 27, 2006

DIabetic Comeback

I have created an additional blog Diabetic Comeback.

As you can imagine, it will be quite different from this one. Should anyone have a better picture idea than the gay lighthouse, let me know.

Also there is new stuff up at the main site!

Thanks for all the good wishes on the reading. CPG thought it went pretty well and hopefully I will have some video up some.

So blog geniuses out there.. How do you add video to your blog?

Thursday, February 23, 2006

and a big red A for Adulterererererers.

Boy wouldn't this look terrible on the back of the presidential motorcade.

Californians are Sick Perverted Wackos.

This is a phrase I have been hearing most of my life. And while the Perverted Wacko part may have some truth... not the sick.

But let's look and see what is going on in the more Traditional All-American States..

Someplace where the corn is high as an elephant's eye, a place where they have both kinds of ice cream at the social, and a whole new take on a pre-nup!

Perhaps say... Iowa?


Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Crackpot Comes ALIVE!

Hi Folks,

I, along with five others, will be doing a reading this Sunday (prose, no politics) at the Hotel Cafe from 6:30-8.
“Tongue & Groove”
The Hotel Cafe
1623 1/2 N. Cahuenga Blvd.
Hollywood, Ca 90028
Others include:

Jillian Dreskin
Whitney Walker
Robert Carrol
Lisa Orkin
and Tim Giblin

With: Musical Guest ROMY.

C'mon on down!

Monday, February 20, 2006

Brash Limburg's Response.

Brash has written an excellent response to my challenge. And yes, I like to think of myself as THE crackpot as he has described me. THE crackpot... yes I do like that. I may have to change my calling card.

I think that all liberals, conservatives and in-betweens should read it as well as Brash's comments to my original challenge below. I also think that no matter where you stand, you should write your own piece. Write from your nads. Rub them together and get a fire going.

The first step is understanding each other, there is very little of that going on right now. Like it or not, political philosophy starts in your heart. It's what charges you. I lived in St. Louis.. where I was demonized by the right... I lived in San Francisco where I was demonized by the left... and I used to work for the The Grateful Dead....but it was during the "Touch of Grey" years. Long after they shrugged their crackpot roots.

Your politics are not a logical conclusion, you just feel how you feel, it is personal.. it's not business. When we understand and respect each other, that's when change can start.

When there are nutjobs (the antonym of "crackpots") such as Colture (who's name I will never learn how to spell), Malkin, Franken, Rhodes, Nader, O'Riley, Hannity, Colmes (how DOES this snively guy sleep at night?... oh yeah with many hookers on a pile of money) .. theese people really don't care that much. Never seen any of these folks at volunteer activity... not even at Christmas.. Don't you people know there is war on Christmas for Chissake? Volunteer for your cause!

Yet, not one of those people gave of themselves. Not only didn't they show up for Toys for Tots, they wouldn't even wrap a present. Do you know how many presents they would have gotten if BOR said "I will be at the Nantucket Mall.. stop on by! Meery Xmas." Four hours out his life... he would have been bigger than Clay Aikin.

Except for Springsteen, Liberals aren't a big draw. Bono is reaching out too much... Madonna is crazy and,like Britney, no one wants to claim her.

It wasn't necessary for them to give for the cause they believe in

or didn't believe in.

If you get a chance listen to Elvis Costello's "Radio Radio" or "Riot Act" off of "Get Happy"

Fuck those chumps.

These people are the political equivelants of Hollywood Execs... they aren't filmmakers/philosophers they are popcorn/30 -second spot advertising salesmen. These people are fucking Dee-jays, they think Brokeback Mountain is as important as Rambo 3...

FYI... Goodfellas or Resevoir Dogs were far better pictures.. they got an emotional reponse.

No more important than Mark and Brian. Yet less important than Alex Bennet.

We should stop listening to their rants and request some action... and protests of any kind are not the answer.... because no one wants to listen to bunch of folks who dont have anything better than block traffic on Wilshire Blvd at 4:00 on a Tuesday afternoon.

There is a reason that W. has won two elections and there is reason why he connects with folks.

No I am not getting soft..but in these time of vitrolic divisions, mud-slinging seems to be the only answer. And it is the wrong answer, it's not productive. And yes, I am a mud junkie from time to time. Ever see Resevoir Dogs? Everyone is pointing fingers at each other and Mr. Pink says "Fuck sides.. what we need is some solidarity here"

The thing that kills me about the times we live in is that there is a ton of mud. And both sides are armed with it because is Mud is cheap... it's as close as a Google. And both fans fight with the tenacity of a Michigan Ohio state game, people want a clearly defined loser and winner. There are no winners (except Rachel Wacholder)

Plato would throw such a hissy.

I dont even want to call myself a moderate. I am a guy who just wants some answers.

I want to know why I am underemployed.
I want to know why I have to pay so many taxes. Why I need $6k in write-offs to declare it a write-off,
I dont want be afraid that my job will be shipped to India, so upper management can get a bonus, so they can take care of their families, so their daughter's can get a reality show.
I want to know why everyone Enroxxon is slapping themselves on the back.

Yes, I am a liberal. An old school liberal, a union liberal, a no bullshit liberal.

I want to knock peoples heads together and tell them to play nice. I am sick of the violence and the propaganda. If you were--- elected give it up, Solve some fucking problems. Give it up, show me some action in even the smallest way.

Do SOMETHING!!!! Start by giving up your vacation time when a disaster hits. Both parties...

Yes I am in favor of taxes..

cigarettes.. tax em.
Booze tax 'em
Porn.. tax 'em (the deficit would go away, the war would be paid for the country would be turning a profit. Why isn't there a porn tax? Porn ain't goin nowhere.. )
Big Business.. tax 'em.
Guy who votes.. cut 'em a break.
You need meds.. tax free.
Tookie? Regardess that he redeemed himself.. he started a huge killing machine that he cannot destroy. Thumbs down. Tookie deserved to die. He killed 100's more than Scott Peterson... and Tookie deserves that same fate.

Politicians.. at least TRY. A little team effort here we are all in this together. Yet some folks think they are less in this than others. Starting with the Conneticut Yankee hanging at the rodeo.

Politicians are ineffective right now, they are too self-absorbed or too worried about keeping their gigs to be effective. There are some good ones.. Boxer, Feinstiein, Naegle , Shays, Obama, hell, I even think Orrin Hatch has his good days.

The only bipartisan thinking that has gone on in recent memory is to support the credit card companies.

And that tells you where YOU stand.

I just want folks to do the right thing and I call them as I see them. Politicians don't do that from their view in the luxury box... they need to be behind the plate.

And this is why Bloggers are important...

We got no one to answer to and our words are important. All of them.

I dont care if you are blue, red or Crackpot maroon .... (a color purposely invented to appeal to the Bugs Bunny crowd)

you are important..

I just think folks should listen to ones who aren't jagovs but folks with nuthin to lose

Jagov is a synonym of nutjob.

Rock on, Brash.

The New Wonkette

I don't think I like the new Wonkette

Now that Ana Marie Cox is gone... it seems to have lost it balls.

And it's not funny....

Or is it just me?

Saturday, February 18, 2006

Brash Limburgh

I like Brash Limburgh.

I think he is a good guy. I think he is smart guy. I think Brash and I would have a great time kicking back some beers and dispensing of singles.

Brash is not a Blind eyed Hannity... he sees the realness....

Brash is more of TR republican, a respectable sort...... I think he likes to stir the pot.. and I don't have a problem with that...

Stirring the pot is good... otherwise your beans will burn.

But there is one question...

Why does does W inspire you?

I don't want to hear about Kerry, Hilary or Moore...

Why is W someone that inspires you?

Why is he a TR?

I will delete any comments that are not contructive, hateful or otherwise....

And BL I will not except rhetoric....

give us the facts....

give us the reasons...

give us something to believe in..

you can not use the numbers 9-11

I'm getting screwed on my Taxes.

Yup, the AVP season is upon us!

This cheers me as I am getting a crappy tax refund.

Mostly because I negotiated a debt settlement and made myself quite a deal. I did save several thousand bucks so it was worth it, but that several thousand bucks I saved is now applied income and it screwed me all up.

Now let's say I had gotten a good tax refund. I have checked the price of gold and have looked into stock option investing.

But it looks like the only thing I am going to be able to afford is this.

Sure I am little biased, but the AVP I think is a great investment opportunity right now. The tour has just been expanded to include 4 different stops (though I still think the Brooklyn open is a terrible idea, but it is a New York Venue), the sport is growing in leaps and bounds in popularity, it has it's staple stars Kirach, Walsh-Traenor, Wacholder, Jasopn Ring is coming up and every game is broadcast on either NBC. Also at $1.50 a share.. it's got nowhere to go but up.
Season starts in just a couple of short weeks.

An easy bet to double your money.

or I just could pay off my car insurance.

Friday, February 17, 2006

I like Guns.

I admit it, I do like guns.

My Mom lives in Tahoe and bears and other scary animals regularly track through her yard. My step father Frank was an old school Teddy Roosevelt Republican. I think everyone could pretty much admit that Teddy Roosevelt was bad ass. He became a fisherman in the 20's, a boyscout and joined the Sierra Club 30's, went to war in the 40's and the 50's, and joined the Democratic Party in the 90's. He quit the NRA around the same time... because it wasn't about hunting anymore. He believed in the food chain. His favorite movie was "A River Runs Through It" He joined the Democrats.. because the were closer to the Republican Party he initially joined. My Mom joined the Dems then too. Feb 4th marked the one year anniversary of his passing. But Frank always said... "Guns belong under glass, they are mechanisms that need to be studied.... like a watch.. they are fascinating"

I wasn't allowed to play with them as a kid. I don't own any now. But I DO have a collection of Louisvill Sluggers, so don't get no idears.. see...

I worry about my mom and the bears. Instead of mothers day flowers , I am thinking about getting her a gun. Frank was a gentle man. They once went to Yellowstone and took a break to read books under a tree that Frank gave me the entire history of.. which I unfortunately cannot remember. Frank gently poked my mother and said... "Be very quiet.. Don't move"

A Moose was ten yards away, and they stared at this beast... and I am sure Frank studied it's mechanisms.

On natural glass. The moose saw them and went on it's way.

Now THAT is an outdoorsman. He shares the world with all living creatures. Some trophies are kept in your mind. Respect the one you call an animal...respect the animal in yourself.

None of the Cheney Bullshit....

It amazes me that the guy he shot came out with a pussy whipped comment like "I am sorry for the pain the Cheney family has gone through" This guy is such a jackass who has to pay off people to hang out with the cool kids, gets shot in the face... and is worried about them????

You lost your FACE!!! You had a heart attack!!! Grow a pair... be a man.

No "I am gonna SUE YOUR ASS" is what he should have done. Someone shoots me in the face..
I am not gonna hang with you and I am gonna tell folks. I have stopped speaking to people for FAR LESS than "You shot me in the face!" These men are not outdoorsmen, they don't respect that nature of the beast. They don't even eat what they kill. OR feed others with what they kill. Do you know how many people out there would LOVE a good quail dinner Quail is good eating!! Like Thanksgiving!

Wanna get your rocks offs? Try Airsoft Guns, that would be a good time. Playing a little paintball with Five deferment Cheney... Now that's good hunting...

So this jagov needs to go and sit back in one of his nice comfy commercial office chairs and think about what it means to be an outdoorsman...

and think about what it means to means to be a man.

Frank would kill me if I bought my mom a gun. I would not be respecting that outdoorsman.

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Strange thing afoot at the Rite-Aid

Some Women really need to know their bodies a little better

So I go to Rite Aide tonight... as I tend to do from time to time. It's wonderous place.

In front of me.. is this 40 or so little rocker blonde babe with purple eyeshadow (which is the New Blue Hair)

With four Summer's Eve's Douche's and three 750ml bottles of Jack Daniels.

" What is really giving you that not so fresh feeling....?"

was the only thought that came to mind.

Rubbers are on aisle four.

I'm, Crazed!!!

Lots of good stuff is going on right now and I am taking part of the day off.

So I highly recommend checking out the Bastard of Art and Commerce's new piece on the new econonomy in Russia.... he's blogging from there LIVE!

It does involve Hookers.

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

The Iran-A-Lyin Begins.

Now we must remember that Iran did indeed ELECT their officials...

But apparantly there is no freedom...

What does Condi Say... ? We can give them $75 million bucks! You know to aid people who don't freedom... to like vote and stuff....

wait they do vote.

Rice tried to take the offensive by announcing an administration request for $75 million this year to build democracy in Iran, saying the U.S. must support Iranians who are seeking freedoms under what she called a radical regime.

I want $75 million for freedom under a radical regime.

That oughta do it! One coup for the low low price of $75 million bucks... and then what?

Judging from the past experiences of throwing cash at the middle east, I have come to one conclusion.

Yup, they will eventually be used that money to attack us.

an Update

Since America seems to be ignorning this situation, I thought I would share what other folks are doing around the world

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Valentine's Day is over.

Which is a great tune by Billy Bragg.

So I go out for a pack of smokes tonight and there is this blonde little pretty trixie out walking her Yappie dog at 10:00 on Valentines Day.

She's telling her friend on the phone about some great resturaunt she just went too..

She had the lobster...

A half a block later... I am thinking to myself...

"Why the HELL aren't you off praising the ceiling tiles?"

Lobster... Valentine's Day...

A little effort here?????

Or just "cue the Nazareth"

What ever happened to seeing paradise by the dashboard light?

Some thoughts on Quail Hunting... by Quail hunter Paul Begala.


Finally... someone is actually going to try and find Bin Ladin!


Well, earlier I was sweating Valentine's Day.. but alas CPG was shipped off to Berlin for the Film Festival this week.. yes, I have managed to avoid Valentine's Day for 11 SMASH YEARS!!

Baby, I know you are working hard and just wanted to Shout out a big HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!

I love you, We'll make it up this weekend... when everything is half price!


P.S. No I am not celebrating being a cheapskate.... we both love a bargain.
And that's hot.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Bush hates Brown Trees

So the new budget has arrived. I think we all agree that Schools need to be improved.

However, the Federal Government doesn't want to pay for it.

Things are tight we have to suck it up...

We must have something in the garage we could sell to help out our schools.

Wait ouyt TREES !!! We don't need those.

According to the LA TIMES the Bush Budget wants to sell off the US of $1 billion of Public Lands
including 85,000 acres of National Forest lands.

Now Mr. Bush has not done much for Califorornia... he won't come to any Urban Areas, he let Enron walk all over us and frankly... he's just an ass.

However, who will he sell it to.. the Sierra Club? The Green Party?


Or perhaps the Logging company he owns..

Shall we start a pool?


I thought Republicans were against big government... not true, another scam.

Again, I know this is a futile attempt and a crackpot idea, but I really think it's time for California to secede from the Nation.

The U.S. Government continues to steal our resources and does little pump it back up.

Why should the 8th Largest Economy in the World help out anymore?

So Mr. Bush... get you damn hands off of my state... Go mess with Texas or some other state that actually votes for you.

Movie News!

I caught myself catching THE BIG CHILL on Turner Classic Movies last night..

I suddenly realized something.

I am older than the characters in THE BIG CHILL. That's sad.

Oy... and now TOP GUN isn't quite as I remember it.

How life changes...

Friday, February 10, 2006

Another Great Show is dead.

So I catch the 2 hour season finale of Arrested Development last night.

Well it was actually four half hours of episodes that Fox wanted to burn. Fox execs are the 2nd biggest cocksuckers in the industry. Basil Iwanyk is the first. How DO you fuck up a Harrison Ford flick?

Mel Brooks once said something similar to the following quote:

"When we did "The Producers" we made a little money, when we made "The 12 Chairs" we blew it all... so when it was time to do "Blazing Saddles" we thought that was it.. we would never make a movie ever again..so we threw everything we could think of in..."

This is what AR did tonight... they should be proud of themselves.

Three characters go to Iraq and, of course, get an American Cab Driver...

Cabbie: "We have to go this way... the Cheney Freeway is backed up all the way to Haliburton Road"

One character feigns a coma to avoid a subpeaona... which leads to a long string of Terry Schiavo gags...including one with a mylar baloon.

Who doesn't love a Terry Schiavo gag?

Ken Lay's scrapbooking party shows money being funneled into an elephants ass.

They really went for the feeding tube with this episode...

Arrested Development we will miss you...Congrats on a good run!

Thursday, February 09, 2006

Finishing School.

Hey Folks,

For the Los Angelenos, my good friend Chiwan Choi has FINALLY decided to hold class.

He is teaching a writing class focused on completing your project.

Chiwan is tireless in his passion for the written word and his enthusiasm for writers. There is a great optimistic energy here.

You should check out his his site THE FINISHING SCHOOL or his lit journal WEDNESDAY MAGAZINE.

For more on Wednesday

OR you can can contact me at Crackpot@crackpotpress.com and I will give you the lowdown.

The first class is limited to eight, so get on the bus.

Today's Word!

Today's Word: Cross Promotion!

I have often been told by my good friend The Bastard of Art and Commerce, "Cross Promotion is the keystone to any good marketing plan."

Then Fox News has it down...today the President announced that a plot had been foiled to attack the Library Building in Los Angeles. The Library Building is now known as the US Bank building. Most Los Angelenos never go downtown unless there is some kind of rave and I doubt that most could even describe what the skyline looks like. Downtown is not an unpleasant place.. it's just far away and only has one major draw.

But Fox News knows all about it. Imagine waking up groggy... haven't even had your first cup of coffee yet.

I flip on Fox and I hear these words "Terrorist... Attack.... Los Angeles"


And then I see an image similar to the one shown here.. except close up and graphic.... it's the fricking US BANK Building being blown. Torn Apart! Dismantled! Explod-a-rama!

All the beautiful people could be dead! Who will I hang with?

I put on my glasses only to see at the bottom of the screen "Photo: Independence Day"

Independence Day!!! You are talking about a potential terrorist threat and you are showing a picture of the Bank building being blown up by ALIENS!! Scared the crap out of me!! And I don't live in a place where Independence Day was a documentary.

Oh wait... 20th Century Fox's Independence Day!

Oh well I get it now. This is not the first time the White House and Fox have gotten together to promote this movie... I can recall at least one other image.

I really can't believe they would use a potential terrorist attack to promote a ten year old flick.

Sorry if I made anyone feel old.

Awlright enough bitching... I DO have an awesome website to run. Screw You Fox and your cross promoting ways!! Next time cane you at least wait for me to get my pants on in the morning before you tell me the aliens are here.

At least I will have some place to crap then.

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Rockwell Noir

Vanity Fair has a very interesting Photo Gallery Up. No, not Nude celebrities Scarlet Johansen or Keira Knightly... (that'll bump up the old keywords searches)

It's a very dark look at the All-American Norman Rockwell Image

All the pictures are very open to interpretation.

This one is called "The Hallway"

Katie Gets Shit on.

Swiped from the Self Hating Homo Blogger.

What a Boehner!

Via Raw Story...

Well this is a notch above renting out the basement from your mom.

And I bet his XBox RULES!

In other Creepy News.. I went to Agitprop today and clicked on their link for a site I would enjoy.

Too Stupid to Be President

An entertaining site. But look under their cafepress ad. It's an Amazon donate thing (which is fine) but it says "HI! Crackpot Press" (well, it said my real name). My REAL NAME.. It said " HI MY REAL NAME! "

I do my best to keep anonymous

How they hell did they find my real name and how long till it starts saying this on other sites I enjoy...

My girlfriend runs every Saturday at 5 AM... And non of this rookie Runyan Canyon crap.. from Santa Monica Blvd.. through Runyan and up to the top of Mullholland... and back

know what this means... NO GETTING GROOVY ON FRIDAYS!!!

and occasionally the internet has been my Friday night date....

I don't want anyone to know about that!!!

shit..i just told everyone.

Anyways, How long till these folks cave to the government?

Frickin' Creepy

Monday, February 06, 2006

I got memed

Good ole Helen Wheels memed me. My first one. I feel so pretty on the inside. Yet so strangely familiar. Maybe I have done this before.

Oh this is the picture you get if you type Meme into google images. Pink floyd.. what a bunch of losers.

But FIRST, from the Genius who selflessly brings you (YES, YOU!) the Bastard of Art and Commerce and Nude.Fat.Man (see side bar)
comes the Daily Cold Stone Jam.

Also so cool new stuff on the main site

7 things I say

Aw Crap!
How many Superbowls have the Panthers won?
Violla! (prounounced literally)
Love ya, mean it!
Yes, I am a Porn Accountant.
I wanted to play Catcher for the Giants… life a bitch huh?
I’m feelin’ confident about that.

7 books I like
George Plimpton is a fricking genius
All My Sons by Arthur Miller
A Total Waste of Make Up by Kim Gruenefelder (hey I need to plug my buddy’s book)
I had a Frightmare by Bil Keane as told by Greg
Burning in Water Drowning in Flames by Bukowski
The Complete Book of Ball Parks
All Too Human by George Stephanapolis

7 movies I enjoy
The Great Escape
All That Jazz
The Bad News Bears--1976
His Girl Friday
Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid
The Player

7 things I enjoy about Cities
Skyline sunsets
Graveyard movies
Walking to anything
Only showing on two screens
Fewer Republicans
Retro Movie Houses
Overall Superiority

7 things I cannot do

Kiss ass…trust me I would be much more successful if I could
See the Ramones
Put my leg behind my head
Eat large amounts of ice cream
Keep the dishes out of the sink
Throw away baseball hats
See the Who Forty years ago

7 Things I must do before I do die

Live on island time
Cure diabetes
Play catcher for the Giants
Have two kids
Fly off to England to Rock with Mick and the Boys
Get a new frickin job
Get to a day where I really don’t care what day it is

Sunday, February 05, 2006

The Pittsburgh Steelers are the World champions

The Pittsburgh Steelers are the World Champions. I once doubted this fact but now I truly realize the errors of my ways.
Tina from Fuzzy and Blue is the ultimate genius in the world and she should never be doubted or questioned.

Again Tina is a true genius who should never be doubted and she like the Pittsburgh Steelers should be heralded at all times.

Saturday, February 04, 2006

Making the A-List!

So the Crackpot Press Main Site has been getting a surprisingly high number of hits this morning.

Where are they coming from... perhaps the New York Book Publishing world has finally realized the genius of the Crackpot Press.


We got a ton of activity from this IP Address.


I didn't like the sound of that.

Turns out this is the IP Address of
Dod Network Information Center in Columbus, Ohio.


Sure, I am flattered that the DOD is taking a peek into us and it's a bit of a badge of honor.

But as we know the DOD isn't so hot when it comes to interpretting their evidence. I mean perhaps they are finally onto Nude Fat Man, perhaps they don't care for Gile's Weaver's take on Crime throughout history, perhaps they want to know what Karen will be wearing to the Academy awards...

Or maybe they are avid Oprah lovers and want to beat up Mike.

Whatever they read into, it will be wrong. So that's a little scary.

Then I checked on which articles they had checked out.

Article #1 ((PG-13)might be considered NSFW)
Article #2

Yup, just another guy trying to spank it at work.

On my Dime!

Thursday, February 02, 2006

Brokeback Steelers

Oh boy...

USA Today is going to have to print a rectraction.

From Davenetics

Novak: State of the Union was his worst

As a hobby, I like to spy on the right. I even once considered joining a Right Wing Dating Site just for the stories. It would be a personal piece of performance art.

But it is nice to see that the Right is begin to smell the cyanide in the Kool-Aid. Amazing what bad approval rating will do.

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Steelers vs. Seahawks--- Side by Side Comparison.

Hey Folks new stuff on the main site!

I have never been to Seattle or Pittsburg. But
from the documentaries I have seen about these
cities; Sleepless in Seattle and All The
Right Moves
, they do have a couple of things
in common-- Lots of rain and very unhappy

Both teams must thankful to get out of their
dreary little towns and head for the gold and the glitz
that is -Detroit Rock City.

But I think the folks in Seattle are just a little more happy. I'll
get to why in just a moment.

Usually around this time of year, my email box starts filling with
all kind of Superbowl taunts, usually from folks whose team have
never one the big one.

One of my favorite friends is a young man named Giles Weaver.
Now young Giles grew up in some backwoods hillbilly haven
where there were no professional sports. Sad, huh?

So he had to bandwagon on to the Pittsburg
Steelers who did quite well in the
70's... mostly due to their Hillbilly
Quarterback with a soothing baritone...
and a gentle beast named Joe. There
was love and a common ground there.
(Just to be fair Young Giles does have a mop
of good hair, most of his teeth and
can spell Cat).

Giles Weaver dozed the day away
dreaming of becoming the next kid with
a coke bottle.

Young Giles dreamed of the day he could leave his before
and after school job in the fields of the R.J Reynolds
Company for the glamorous paparazzi filled life of an Allentown
Steelworker. Is it so wrong for a young man to dream about feeling
pretty... just once?

But like most dreams, this was crushed as he was lured into the seamy
world of professional blogging. He never made it to the big city...
not even for a weekend jaunt.

Now young Giles is filled with boyhood Glee as the Steelers are about to go
head-to-head in Detroit over the weekend. Ah, two towns in desperate need
of Canadian prozac. Damn that FDA.

Should be a pretty a competitive outing.

However, the Seahawks have one thing going for them the Steelers do not.
For this one reason alone, the Steelers do not deserve any respect.

Here is a picture of the beautiful West Coast Seattle Seahawks "Sea Gal"

Here is a the last known picture of the Pittsburg Steelerettes.

That's right. The Pittsburg Steelers have not had cheerleaders
in 45 years.

And while I usually reserve the bottom rung of the world for the
Carolina Panthers and the Dallas Cowboys, this recently discovered
fact shoves them right down to the bottom of the pack.

So for young Giles

there will be no Rah-Rah..

there will be no pom-poms.

But still a boy can dream.....

Be gentle with him, God.

(Crackpot Press always welcomes alternative viewpoints)