Potluck.

Ya know I went to a potluck party on Saturday night. A bunch of us get together once a month have a little wine, a little food and read prose. The diversity of the crowd is fantastic. The oldest is a former ACLU publicist the youngest a brash 22 year old actor.

In any case, one of our regulars read a beautiful bit about riding her bike in Santa Monica near the monument. For those who don't know, at the Santa Monica Pier on the beach there are crosses placed for every soldier that has been killed in Iraq and Afghanistan. It's been amazing to watch it grow over the last few years.

It's the quietest spot on the beach.

The woman finished her piece when our hostess announces that one of our group couldn't attend tonight, a close friend of his had been killed in Iraq on Thursday.

A man of 38 doing his 2nd tour, he was supposed to have been done with his commitment.

But he got recalled.

There was an a very deep moment in that room as we all took a moment in spontaneous silence to honor someone we had never met.

Last night, Memorial day, I didn't have any plans. So I decided to make a great steak, some asparagus and have a few beers and watch the ball game.

I really enjoyed every moment. I wished that even one soldier who I have never met could have come over.

Dave
Crackpotpress.com

Iraq is Gonna be the WHAT ???

Bush Hails Naval Academy Graduates
Friday, May 27, 2005
PHOTOS

ANNAPOLIS, Md. — The U.S. military is on the offensive in the War on Terror (search) to prevent terrorists from reaching America's shores, President Bush said Friday, adding that 20 years from now, historians will look back on the Iraq war as "America's golden moment."


This is just disgusting. How can ANYONE see this time in history at "America's GOlden Moment"?

He does realize that there are far MORE terrorists in Iraq NOW than there was before we invaded?

History will remember him as the Great Con Artist.

JUDGE TO PARENTS: I KNOW WHAT'S BEST FOR YOUR KIDS

First of all, thank you Daze for that compelling report from Santiago. The Blog passwords have now been changed.

In other news, Judge: Parents can't teach pagan beliefs
Father appeals order in divorce decree that prevents couple from exposing son to Wicca.

Challenging the court: Thomas E. Jones Jr. says a judge's order tramples on his and his ex-wife's constitutional right to share their religious beliefs with their son.
-- Frank Espich / The Star
By Kevin Corcoran
kevin.corcoran@indystar.com

An Indianapolis father is appealing a Marion County judge's unusual order that prohibits him and his ex-wife from exposing their child to "non-mainstream religious beliefs and rituals."
The parents practice Wicca, a contemporary pagan religion that emphasizes a balance in nature and reverence for the earth.

Cale J. Bradford, chief judge of the Marion Superior Court, kept the unusual provision in the couple's divorce decree last year over their fierce objections, court records show. The order does not define a mainstream religion.

What is Wicca?Wicca is not a centralized religion but a belief system observed by 50,000 Americans that is recognized by reference texts such as the U.S. Army Chaplain's Handbook.Wicca is related to European tribal nature worship. Wiccans regard living things as sacred and often show a concern for the environment.They do not worship Satan, but some cast "spells." Some worship in the nude as a sign of attunement with nature.The core value of Wicca states, "As it harm none, do what you will."-- Star report

Though no longer practicing, I was raised as a Christian Scientist, a non-mainstream religion with fewer worshipers than Wicca.

Is that illegal now?

Should the Christian Science Monitor be outlawed?

Can I get a ruling on this?

Et tu Janel

I am not really watching the Amber Frey movie on CBS.,.

It's on over there somewhere.

Janel... you are a mini-Alison Janney.. sexy and smart. I WAS in the process of hiring a hooker who looks like you a little... but not anymore! I am getting a drooper now.

And I am using my coupon I got from the desk clerk.

Who the hell talked you into doing an AMBER FREY movie....?

We like you on West Wing.... a hot girl that is a bundle of insecurities who finally find her voice.

You are not the average "flavor of the month" snackette. You are a really good actress.

YOu are better than this....Damn those who don't agree with me...they are morons.

Giles, Crackpot save me here...bring Crackpot Press back to the high journalistic standards we hold somewhat dear when we feel like it.. Whatever, it;s not my job tonight.

It's up to you to restore our street cred...

Giles, Talk about something important..

Daze Strange

P.S. Santiago is sweaty this time of yuear. You'd like it.

Fox News times a Google

So I typed in "John Kerry" into Google and got the White House Press Room.

Google hires neo-con headbanger
By Andrew Orlowski
Published Tuesday 24th May 2005 09:42 GMT

The company that prides itself on "Doing No Evil" isn't taking any chances with its latest executive appointment. Dan Senor, the company's new Global Communications and Strategy VP, has a CV guaranteed to have Register columnist Otto Z Stern firing a celebratory fusillade skywards from his compound in New Mexico.

A former Senior Associate at the Carlyle Group, Senor was briefly Scott McLellan's deputy as White House spokesman before becoming head of the the Coalition Provisional Authority in Iraq's information department. The White House web site bills him as Senior Advisor to Presidential Envoy L. Paul Bremer III. Fox News hired Senor as a panelist in February. While in Iraq Senor showed his loyalty by going jogging in a Bush-Cheney '04 tracksuit.

Now most of the the left websites use google advertising on their sites. Should Google go the way of Fox News, do we start pulling them?

Blogspot is owned by Google... do we dart? Could this be the end of Web Freedom of Speech?

North America Settled by Just 70 People

"About 14,000 years ago, humans crossed the Bering land bridge from Siberia to North America, most experts agree. But just how many intrepid explorers were involved has not been known."

The Filibuster Compromise

The theme for today's "news" cycle is that we're all supposed to rejoice like its VE Day over the bi-partisan spirit in the Senate that produced a compromise over the filibuster issue. Somehow we're supposed to be impressed that members of the worst Senate in American history, led by a cat killer, decided not to shoot themselves in the face.

The entire filibuster debate can only be characterized as one massive lie after the next, and of course the media went along for the ride. Lie after lie after lie after lie. And we have Bill Frist, who clearly needs a serious ass whipping, saying that changing the rules is still a possibility. Now they call it the "constitutional option" even though it has nothing to do with the Constitution. George Orwell himself could take lessons from these bozos. What a bunch of pompus putrid slea stacks.

The depth of hypocrisy and lack of vision from the GOP in the Senate is staggering, but does not come close to matching the level of extreme stupidity of this nation's people. America is a land of morons (except for Crackpot Press readers of course) led by morons, so pop that champagne -- it will only be another couple of days before we can forget all about this and pretend we are a functioning democracy that is the envy of the world. Nobody envies us. They hate us. They laugh at us. They laugh, and wait for the fall. With fools and wretches like Bill Frist who can blame them?

The Stem Cell Research Bill

The house voted to loosen the restrictions on Stem Cell research bill.

This is the first bi-partisan bill to be passed in recent memory.

The "Great Uniter" has promised to veto.

Research. Thinking about it. Experimenting. Trying a new approach.

It's against the culture of life.

Question for the "Great Uniter" : Have you ever vetoed a weapons bill? A weapons main purpose is to take life. The weapons main function is to take life. It's not for target practice. Production for use. Can you shave a couple of bucks off of the "take life" bill to help out?

Question for the "Great Uniter": Can you think that for once that maybe the vast majority of Americans are for this? Can you represent them? Can you be a big enough man to think the vast majority of Americans think this is worth a shot?

Question for the "Great Uniter": Can you try to Unite? On just one issue?

Question for the "Great Uniter": You have often joked about your poor grades, your ineloquence, your love of sleeping. Is it possible that someone else may have an edge in the smarts department?

Look, I am someone who, technically, could benefit from Stem Cell Research.

Realistically, I don't think stem cell research is something that will be available or affordable to "regular folk" in my lifetime.

I don't want someone 50 years from now to go through what I have to go through.

Unless, of course, they are against a cure like a "Great Uniter." For the rest, support your favorite local, medical charity.... they need your help.

Read a book to someone, help a kid reach a goal, smile at someone for no reason. Give an hour this year. The great uniter doesn't give a damn.

The world changes with YOU. Get pissed off enough that if you don't do some good, you will go insane.

Do something good today, if today isn't good for you, Do something that makes it impossible to wipe the smile off of your face for doing this year.

I challenge ya'll spend one hour this year to make someone else's life better.

You deserve it.

and so does someone else. Be a Uniter.

Sincerely,

David "Crackpot" Howard

[URL=http://www.crackpotpress.com]Crackpot Press[/URL]

"Tal Afar is living now some kind of civil war," he said.

Fourteen U.S. soldiers have been killed in Iraq in the last three days. Don't expect the MSM to tell us what is really happening there. The Iraqi civil war is not on the way, it is already happening. We're not going to see Sunnis and Shiites lining up across a field from each other with Islamic flags and drummer boys (i.e. The North vs The South). It will start gradually, town by town, city by city, until the Kurds and the Turkoman are caught up in it as well. Once the fighting is so widespread that even our pathetic Soviet media can't hide behind its vacuous patriotic slogans, then Iran and Turkey will become players as well. Who will be caught in the middle of all of this? That's right -- U.S. soliders just like the fourteen killed this week. Of course, and I say this quite often, I'm sure it won't be a problem given all the college Republicans lining up at our military recruitment offices. Smart bombs, whatever, have you ever had to spend more than five minutes with a college Republican? The whole Middle East will surrender over night.

17 Years of Progress...?

The baby boomers have failed us. I love Bob Dylan and always will. I just saw his show at the Pantages Theatre in Los Angeles a couple of months ago. However, once the "voice of a generation," now he sings bluesy love songs while the world burns.

Fifteen years after Vietnam... Seventeen years ago...

PLANET EARTH 1988

by The Ramones

The solution to peace isn't clear
The terrorist threat is a modern fear
There are no jobs for the young
They turn to crime and turn to drugs
Battle ships crowd the sea
16 year olds in the army
Our jails are filled to the max
Discrimination against the blacks

Russians and Americans war machine
Will destroy mankind's dream
They shoot their missiles in the air
They do not care they do not care
Guerrilla armies rule the street
No more christmas or trick or treat
Is this what the future will bring
I pray for peace more than anything

The solution to peace isn't clear
The terrorists threat is a modern fear
There is no future for the youth
There is no hope for the young
Death destruction bombs galore
The rich are laughing at the poor
Our jails are filled to the max
Discrimination against the blacks

Happy Birthday to Bob Dylan

Today is Bob Dylan's 64th birthday.

A Radio Station was playing "The Times They Are a Changin" to celebrate it.

I was listening to the lyrics and I was wondering why his generation seems to have lost it's way. Those changed times have changed back. And this once (self?) important generation doesnt seem to care. When the draft ended it meant that the war no longer effected each and everyone of us. That's when the majority of the boomers walked away.

Will we still need you when you're 64? You betcha, where are you?

Come gather around people wherever you roam
And admit that the waters around you have grown
And accept it that soon you'll be drenched to the bone.
If your time to you is worth saving
Then you better start swimming or you'll sink like a stone.

Come writers and critics, who prophesize with your pen
And keep your eyes wide, the change won't come again
And don't speak too soon for the wheel's still in spin
And there's no telling who that is naming
For the loser now will be later to win.
For the time they are a-changing.

Come senators, congress-men, please heed the call,
Don't stand in the doorway, don't block up the hall.
For he that gets hurt will be he who has stalled
There's a battle outside and it's raging
It'll soon shake your windows and rattle your walls.
For the times they are a-changing.

Come mothers and fathers thru-out the land
And don't criticize what you don't understand.
Your sons and your daughters are beyound your command
Your old road is rapidly aging
Please get out of the new one, if you can't lend your hand.
For the times they are a-changing.

The line it is drawn, the curse it is cast
The slow one now will later be fast
As the present now will later be past.
The order is rapidly fading
And the first one now will be later the last.
For the times they are a-changing.

Join the Crusade.

A while back George Bush has tried to explain that this is not a holy war against Islam....

He may want to explain this to the marines... they seem to think otherwise . Check out the new tank cannon "Christened" as the "New Testament"

Courtesy of the Department Of Defense via Ameriblog

An excellent question

Is it actually possible to flush a Koran???

http://silentrunning.tv/archives/005868.php

The Empire Falls Over Its Own Idiocy

Does anybody find it disturbing that a high ranking official from Iran is visiting Iraq?

I know Americans don’t know or understand anything about the Middle East, or their own country for that matter, but it should be clear to everybody by now that nationalism is not a traditional cohesive force in Middle Eastern culture. The national borders of the modern Middle East were drawn up by Western powers at the end of World War I for colonial purposes. The irony here is that a form of Middle Eastern nationalism was created by the Balfour Agreement and the Treaty of Sevres in those affected countries when they finally overthrew their colonial masters – France and Britain (including Iraq. Of course the Palestinians are still under Israeli occupation). So, here we have our new 51st state – Iraq – and yet there still is no traditional nationalist spirit that binds the country together. It is still dominated by ethnic and religious ties. In fact, even the nationalism that does exist is built up from the Muslim faith regardless of the extremity.

Here is my point about Iran. They are dominated by Shiite clerics who rule a theocracy. Iraq’s new political majority is the Shiites, who will naturally gravitate toward their Shiite brothers in Iran, more so than their Sunni country men next door, regardless of fundamental differences in political structures (the Iraq Shiite clerics do not want an Iran style theocracy -- or at least we hope they don't). Meanwhile, we are sowing the new seeds of our own future destruction.

We are pressuring Iran on their nuclear ambitions and will use military action to stop it, or will support military action by Israel to stop it. At the same time, we are arming and training thousands of Shiites in Iraq to fight a vicious Sunni insurgency that we created. It is my belief that it will inevitably lead to full out civil war like in Lebanon during the 1980s. The difference is that the United States will be in the middle of all these warring factions of which none will have any incentive to work with us. The more we press Iran on other matters, the closer we press our current Shiite “allies” in Iraq toward our current Shiite “enemies” in Iran. When they turn on us, they will start killing us with our own weapons and training – just like Osama Bin Laden. Remember him?

Revenge of the Sith Pics

The Pictures of Opening Night at Revenge of the Sith at the Arclight's Cineramdome Hollywood are up at www.crackpotpress.com

Enjoy, if you want to steal stuff, feel free. If you want to publish them on your site, just make sure you let folks know where they came from.

May the force be with you, girl dressed like Leia... call me,

Crackpot

Strange Daze Indeed

I arrived at the Arclight on Sunset Boulevard about 6:30pm. The Stormtroopers, led by Darth Vadar, had already marched to Grauman's Chinese Theatre a mile away and returned with the most dedicated STAR WARS fans and the place was heating up. I would have been there to witness the Imperial escort except I have a job (which I hate, but that's another blog entirely).

One of the more sporting parts of the evening was watching Target store promoters get mobbed by fans wanting the free junk they were handing out in bright fire orange STAR WARS bags outside the theatre. Contents: 1 bottled water, 1 inflatable STAR WARS beach ball, 1 small carton of Froot Loops (I'm not making this up), a tiny container of M&Ms, an unidentifiable square package with the Death Star on it that looks like an old vinyl 45, and a commerative "coin" with the "Target Dog" on it holding a light sabre in its mouth. My guess is that the total value = $3.00. As they handed you a bag (or as you ripped it off their arm) they said "STAY ON TARGET."

My target was a petite Asian girl in full Jedi regalia with a pink light sabre to which I would like to devote my eternal lust and a fairly good sized chunk of cash. Her love of STAR WARS and her incredibly perfect stomach made me sink to my knees and weep openly. Hot geek girl sex is one of life's little pleasures. I was going to take five billion pictures of her once I dispensed with her giant boyfriend, but, in a court of law, a good attorney can argue that such a picture falls under the legal definition of "stalking." I'm not going down that legal black hole again.

A special mention goes out to the Princess Lea in the bikini. She actually looked like a real (HOT) woman and not the Skeletors you ususally find at Hollywood events. There's nothing worse than a beautiful woman who looks like food needs to be airlifted to her and we've got 'em here in spades.

Pictures to follow.

Get your Geek on!

Coming soon! (yes, today..well more like tonight)

Star Wars Pictures from the Arc Light Hollywood Cinerama Dome!

If we didn't have dumb jobs they'd be up much sooner...

But we do, so it's later!

Every Convention Needs a Porn Star!

I really don't know what this Republican Party is all about. They talk about Morality and then
they hire gay prositutes to service the White House.

All hell would break loose if this happened at the DNC!!!

What are these guys thinking????? Weren't/ aren't they trying toBan Porn....

Anyways cue the music! Bar-chick-ber-ban

Haliburton Calvary

It is being reported by http://houston.indymedia.org/ that over a dozen protestors have been trampled by police horses during the Halliburton Stock Holders Meeting.

Another loss for the Indians.

Let's press some charges.

The Halliburton Calvary??

According to the Smirking Chimp:

At least a dozen protestors were trampled by Police Horses at the protest of the Halliburton annual meeting.

Can anyone tell me if this is actually true?

Noticias con Juevos y Olberman!

It's time for journalists to stop getting beat up and do their jobs!

Bring back the specialty of the house!

Keith Olberman has finally decided to take some action...

Better late than never...

Finally someone with good hair Speaks out!

The resignation of Scott McClellan (Keith Olbermann)

Evangelicals Starting to See the Light! Praise!

One-third? I'll take it.

College ad to protest Bush visit
By Julia Duin
THE WASHINGTON TIMES

One-third of the professors at an evangelical Christian college in Grand Rapids, Mich., are taking out a large ad in a local newspaper Saturday to protest President Bush's commencement speech. "As Christians, we are called to be peacemakers and to initiate war only as a last resort," the ad will say. "We believe your administration has launched an unjust and unjustified war in Iraq." The 130 signatories, which include 20 staff members, work at Calvin College. Founded in 1876 as a school for pastors of the Christian Reformed Church, it now is one of the nation's flagship schools for a Christian liberal-arts education.

Would ya like a Coke with your Disney Porn?

Susie Bright has reported on the New "Hall of Shame" for Immoral Companies! (goto site and Click on Hall of Shame

Some of the immoral categories include such EVIL-NESS as "anti-family entertainment producer," "Non-Married Lifestyle" and "Planned Parenthood Contributor"

The Walt Disney Company is listed as an "anti-family entertainment producer"

Also RJ Reynolds is listed as a "Tobacco" producing company....yet... Phillip Morris is not....

I guess the "Oreos" make up for it.

Dr. Hannity

Sean Hannity was given a Doctorate Degree in Humanities from Liberty U. Jerry Falwell presented him with the degree.

That night on the show he was discussing a Sex-Ed program that was wrong because it showed proper condom use on a cucumber. The class was for tenth graders. While discussing the issue Sean is saying how awful it is for our kids to be learning this stuff. The video they play over his comments show SEVEN YEAR OLDS playing in class.

If you are sophmore in high school, you are preparing for a driver's license. And you figure out how to park that car pretty quick.

Apprarantly, there was no biology nor Humanities taught at Liberty.

Celeb night at the Rite-Aid

Okay, so I had to put out a fire tonight and by 9:00 I am ready for a couple beers and a good flick.

I know, what could be more exciting than being an accountant by day and Webmaster by night?

The following is True.

So I got to Blockbuster in the huge strip mall by my house. I pick out some previously used flicks...

"Anchorman,"" Friday Night Lights (a true story which I haven't seen but everyone says it rocks)" and "Confession of a Dangerous Mind" which I think is some of the best writing ever. And George Clooney is no hack as a director. It's a good flick...but a BETTER story. For those who don't know, it is the "autobiography" of Chuch Barris, game show producer from the 70's, and his account as Game Show Producer by Day, CIA operative at night. When he needs to go out of town, they work it into the Show.... "Congratulations, you have won a trip to East Berlin, we'll send a chaperone with ya"

Who cares if it's true... yeah right Hamlet's fake, the Odyssey is fake, Lord of the Rings is Fake, Except for "Octopussy" all the James Bond movie's are "fake." And I have been overdosing my political junkie... and hearing all the stuff that is going on and my head is spinning. I have had too much “true.”

Dammit, I need some "fake."

I buy my movies, behind me in line was a 19 somethingish gal getting a "Sex in the City" which is fake, but most women think is real. At the last minute a Blockbuster employee pulls out "Phantom of the Opera" which is fake. And she opts for that.

Then I get a dose of the real.

I walk out and Eric McCormack is sitting there signing an autograph from some square tourist from Akron ( no one in LA, even in the valley, is wearing a Buckeye's Shirt) who probably voted for Bush...because God Hates Fags. Reality....or Fiction? He was there with his boy (who looks freakishly like him), so I guess it was cool. He seemed very gracious and, in fact, happy. Good for him. I guess the tourists prefer the fact rather than the fiction.

Then I go to Rite Aid down the strip mall promenade(they really have the best beer prices) and Jay Mohr and his son come in and they are having a good time too, screwing around in the Rite-Aid.

So the question I have been struggling with my entire life is.... what is fact, what is fiction, what is real, what isn't?

Okay... I need to watch Anchorman before I go insane thinking about this. I'm pretty sure that's fake, but it is based on someone who is real.

-Crackpot

To Paraphrase Billy Joel..."Sod-O-my is such a lonely word"

So I got a good spam this morning. It's from someone named "Boyd McNeal" and the subject line "Waiting for a Miracle"

The message then goes on to say
"The law of the wise is a fountain of life, to depart from the snares of death. But her end is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a twoedged sword. The soul of the sluggard desireth, and hath nothing but the soul of the diligent shall be made fat. Before the mountains were settled, before the hills was I brought forth But ye have set at nought all my counsel, and would none of my reproof "

Then it lets me know how to score some Viagra! I get more of the Christian Style Mailings whenever I visit the Drudge Report and his "site-o-spyware"!

But folks stop pandering to the RELIGOUS RIGHT, they OBVIOUSLY have all the VIAGRA, and they are going all buttfucnutty!

Let's review so events from this week:
Mr. Ed (R-GA)

John Bolton (R-From from where the hell I say I see I am from you fucking pinhead!)

Dr. David Hagar, (Religous Nut and FDA's Expert on Illegalizing your body)

and ya just can't say enough about:

Mr. Sodomy 2005! and his bitch! (neither of these are real stories, cuz let's face it we need a fresh spin on this)

"Life Ain't Nothing but a funny, funny riddle. THANK GOD I'm a country boy"

Endangered Species -- Actual Journalism -- Discovered in White House Press Room

This may be my favorite thing of the month. Other than the cheerleaders in Texas. And the intelligent design whack jobs in Kansas. And the "turn the other cheek" preacher in North Carolina. And the bonehead at the National Review who thinks REVENGE OF THE SITH is an anti-Bush movie. And Sherwood. And West. And John Bolton at Plato's Retreat. Oh -- and this Republican hypocrisy gem (in THE NATION):

http://www.thenation.com/doc.mhtml?i=20050530&s=mcgarvey

Yes, it has been a magical May. However, this exchange regarding the "plane scare" in Washington D.C. yesterday holds a special place in my heart. Why? Because there is nothng that is more insulting to the collective intelligence of this fair nation, and this fair world, than virtually every putrid word of psychobabble that emanates from White House Press Secretary Scott McClellan's mouth. So when the spin becomes so divorced from reality (thank you Jeff Gannon) that even the White House press corps can't take it, you know it is a very special day:

McCLELLAN: Well, again, if you want to give me a chance to respond, I'll be glad to. The protocols were followed. This situation, as you're well aware, turned out to be an accident. The Department of Defense pointed out yesterday that they didn't sense any hostile intent on the part of the plane. There were fighter jets scrambled. There was a Blackhawk helicopter scrambled, as well, to get in contact with the plane. ...

Q So if it was assessed that there was no hostile intent on the part of this aircraft, can you tell us why 30,000 people -- 35,000 people were told to run for their lives?

McCLELLAN: Because of the protocols that are in place, John. We want to make sure that the people in the area of the threat are protected. After --

Q: But what was the threat? You just said there was no threat.

McCLELLAN: John, after Sept. 11, we have to take into account the world that we live in. We live in a very different world than we did before Sept. 11. And the president is going to do everything in his power to make sure we are protecting the American people and to make sure that the people in areas that could be high-risk areas are protected, as well.

Q: Right, but there seems to be so many disconnects here. You've got a plane that was assessed as not being a threat, you've got 35,000 people evacuated, you've got a person who you claim is a hands-on commander in chief who is left to go ride his bicycle through the rural wildlands of Maryland while his wife is in some secure location somewhere, it's just not adding up.

The phrase "it's just not adding up" is definitely the understatement of the new century.

Dennis Cancelled, Right Wing not Amusing

DENNIS MILLER CANCELLED

I saw this and thought that and thought it was a no-brainer. This latest incantation of the Dennis Miller show was simply just not funny. But why? The HBO Dennis Miller show was. They are both basically the same format with a couple of different writers.

Here is the big difference, when Dennis decided to host a “Right Wing” show he killed his audience. We liked him as independent skewering both sides. His brand of comedy leans heavily on elitist (sometimes Pompous) intellectual snobbery. This is inherently a trademark of the left. We on the left have the patent on elitist, intellectual snobbery. We dig it, we yearn for it.
We love being superior.

I feel like he had to dumb down his show to reach his core audience. Also, I have a feeling that he may have lost some good quality writers due to the subject matter.

And let’s face it, Republicans are just not funny people. There hasn’t been a Republican with a marketable sense of humor since Ronald Reagan (“Communism is illegal, Bombing will start in Five Minutes”—that’s some genius shit!). I’m sitting here trying to think of a funny Republican in the last 20 years. There are some who think they are funny. Go up and down the AM radio dial…show me funny. I mean like funny “ha-ha”


I’m waiting.


Dennis, you were funny till started pandering to the right. Your people don’t get you.

-Crackpot

Payback is Hell

The Waynesville, NC preacher who booted nine members of his congregation for being Democrats has resigned.

In typical conservative fashion, he is playing the victim card, and in typcial conservative "X-Files" fashion, he is claiming that tapes which contain his overtly right wing political sermons were "doctored" (just like all that Iraq intelligence, I guess).

The conservative, and evangelical, hubris that swept over the country in the immediate aftermath of the November election is leading the right wing into a sociopolitical dead end.

Social Security... rising gas prices... Terri Shiavo... John Bolton... the Blair memo... Jim West... the bankruptcy bill... the class action lawsuit bill... Justice Sunday... the soon to be used "nuclear option"... North Korea... and, of course, the biggest conservative mess in American history -- Iraq.

Yes... the chickens are coming home to roost. The much ballyhooed unstoppable conservative movement is in a crisis of its own making. They forgot how incredibly stupid they actually are, and that reality would inevitably catch up with their lies. Today, Waynesville, tomorrow...?

Experts: Iraq verges on civil war

How is that all of us "non-experts" predicted civil war BEFORE the invasion, but our government, the MSM, and the "experts" didn't until now?

Oh that's right -- because they're liars and fools.

http://www.newsday.com/news/nationworld/world/ny-woiraq0512,0,4630319.story?coll=ny-top-headlines

O, Sweet Child of Mine

Temporarily taking a break from raving political rants. There is guy in my office 30-35 ish or so. Just got out of a long term relationship and is now dating a gal who is 21.

He has said that he is a little concerned that they don't have that much in common. Like music, she didn't know who Guns and Roses were.

I was amazed and then I thought about that for a second "Appetite for Destruction" came out in 1988-ish.... She would have been four.

This is why I refuse to date women born after the initial release of Star Wars.

One step closer to international embarassment...

Voinovich Slams Bolton but OKs Senate Vote

It should not be a surprise that the sheep all bleated out the same nonsense this morning: "He's terrible, but..."

I simply do not understand this. There are many qualified people that we would be proud to have represent us at the United Nations, so why are we going to get stuck with someone who despises the U.N. and everything it stand for, as well as man who is simply not qualified to be diplomat?

Regardless of his continuously sinking approval ratings, Bush has his second term. To confirm this monster just so Bush doesn't have a political defeat in the MSM is ridiculous at best, dangerous at worst.

I'd love to see some comments about why Bolton SHOULD be our ambassador to the U.N. Beacause Bush picked him isn't good enough of a reason. Bolton is not representing Bush. He's representing all of us.

Freedom is on the march!

To the Mariana Islands.

http://www.cia.gov/cia/publications/factbook/geos/cq.html

But unlike that OTHER freedom on the march, I'm not sure corporate America is supporting this one. Click on the "all the major brands" link in the article below to view the legal case which will free the laborers in the Mariana Islands. From the Center for American Progress:

ETHICS

The Isles that Bind
Ah, the tropical Northern Marianas Islands. About three-quarters of the way from Hawaii to the Philippines, with a population of just over 80,000, these U.S. territories acquired after World War II are the central locale of a "dirty drama of bondage" that enmeshes disgraced lobbyist Jack Abramoff, House leader Tom Delay, President Bush, and scores of conservative lawmakers, journalists, and activists. That's because the Marianas (and particularly the main island, Saipan) are also the site of America's most shoddy labor practices. Human "brokers" bring thousands there to work as sex slaves and in cramped sweatshop garment factories where clothes (complete with "Made in the U.S.A." tag) have been produced for all the major brands: Tommy Hilfiger, Gap, Calvin Klein, Liz Claiborne, The Limited, J.C. Penney, and – surprise, surprise – Wal-Mart. The workers are "paid barely half the U.S. minimum hourly wage," and are "forced to live behind barbed wire in squalid shacks minus plumbing, work 12 hours a day, often seven days a week, without any of the legal protections U.S. workers are guaranteed." And if DeLay, Abramoff, and President Bush get to decide, that's how things will stay.

Will It Matter?

From Raw Story:

"Allegations that Mr. Bolton's first wife, Christina Bolton, was forced to engage in group sex have not been refuted by the State Dep't despite inquires posed by Hustler publisher Larry Flynt concerning the allegations. Flynt has obtained information from various sources that Bolton participated in paid visits to Plato's Retreat, a popular swingers club that operated in NYC in late 1970s and early 1980s.... MORE....

www.rawstory.com

But will it matter? I don't think so. Even if we had photographs of John Bolton strangling babies while he urinates on the Bible, all the Republicans on the committee would still line up to vote for him, and the Republican Congress will do the same. Why? Because the 109th Congress of the United States of America is probably the most embarassing and criminal legislative body that has ever disgraced the halls of Washington D.C. I include in that statement, without reservation, all the so called Democrats who have lined up against the general welfare of the people on the bankruptcy bill, the class action bill, and the energy bill.

Don't even bother to read anything more about John Bolton. None of it matters. He will be our representative to the United Nations. Failure = Promotion in the Bush Administration. Its that simple.

College Republicans Volunteer En Masse for War in Iraq!

Yeah right.

WE ARE THE YOUNG REPUBLICANS!!

But at least they have time to defraud seniors!

Why is it that Republican Party just can't keep their hands off of people's social security checks?

Let's Not Forget Bechtel!

The King of War Profiteering! Let's do some math:

$1 billion for veterna's health care: NO
$100 billion for unworkable missle defense shield: YES

http://www.counterpunch.com/stclair05092005.html

SCREW YOU -- PART II

In April, every Republican member of the Senate except Arlen Spectre (R - Pennsylvania) voted against an ammendment to an emergency spending bill for Iraq and Afghanistan that would have provided addtional funds for veteran's medical care. Every Democrat supported the amendment. See the post REPUBLICANS TO MILITARY VETERANS -- SCREW YOU! on this blog for details.

Now, in May, the trend continues. While our active duty soldiers and veterans continue to get the shaft, we are extremely happy to report that the Army has not forgotten to take care of our good friends at Hallburton. Despite audits that show Halliburton has routinely ripped off the taxpayers of this country, $72 million in BONUSES have been approved for this corporate nightmare.

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=568&e=5&u=/nm/20050510/bs_nm/iraq_halliburton_dc

While the monetary amounts here are different ($1 billion vs $75 million), I believe this latest corporate give away demonstrates how skewed our national priorities have become. The defense industry and related sub contractors are getting filthy rich in Iraq on the backs of our soldiers. That's OUR money and companies like Halliburton are getting bonuses for ripping us off, while our soldiers get defective body armor when the Army finally ships it to them. It is a disgusting and shameful national disgrace, but its all part of our new political ethos which rewards all things corporate, and suppresses all things human.

For more information on why Halliburton should be burned to the ground go here:

http://www.halliburtonwatch.org/

or here

http://www.warprofiteers.com/article.php?list=type&type=15

Huffington vs. Drudge

As some may know Arianna Huffington got together with some liberal pals to put together "The Huffington Report"

Wow, so no shocker, the top headline at the Drudge Report today is
"FINKE: HUFFINGTON LAUNCH DISASTER; GEFFEN NO-SHOW... "

To save you some time, Nikke Finke does a hachet job as a self proclaimed "Hollywood Insider,"

She writes for the LA WEEKLY. Now every major city has their version of the LA WEEKLY. You know the one, it's the free rag at the 7-11 that tells you what bands are playing around town. Then it has one or two articles then it's real purpose...50-60 pages of ads for Hookers and Coupons for Strip Clubs (which really help in those "thin" rent weeks, thanks guys!)

But in her defense, you can't be a "Hollywood Insider" without knowing a couple of whores.

She proclaims it a FAILURE, David Geffen didn't show up, the "only" people they could get were Larry David, John Cusack, Ellen DeGeneres, etc..

Uh, These are good people! I would kill to have these people at Crackpot Press, let alone on the first day. Im guessing half of America doesn't really know who David Geffen is. Who would you rather see on Larry King?

Anyways, since she works for Matt Drudge, you know the guy that scans healdines and links them to his site and calls himself a journalist, you gotta take it with a grain of salt.

I mean c'mon these guy have already claimed the Iraq war (1600 Americans Dead as of this weekend) and the first 100 days of "W"'s second term are a success (Aproval rating hoovers in the low 40's).

So my guess is that I'm not taking any stock tips from these folks.

Besides as any Hollywood Insider knows "It ain't over till business affairs calls."

Good luck Arianna, Welcome to the Web! Im glad you had a good first day.

-Crackpot

cc: Nikki Finke (sounds like a made up stripper's name don't it)
Matt Drudge

Who's Left in Iraq????

COALITION COUNTDOWN!

I was thinking about it and I was wondering which of the Original Coalition Members were still in Iraq. I cut and pasted a list from White House.gov, it's not so accurate anymore.... Check it out below.

For somewhat dated (March 2005) info check out this courtesy of FOX NEWS! Lots of folks have been packing it up. Plus the general news of the last six weeks.

So here is my count. If you spot an inaccuracy, let me kniow

Afghanistan (Their army is the US Army)
Albania
Australia
Azerbaijan
Bulgaria
Colombia***
Costa Rica
Czech Republic
Denmark
Dominican Republic
El Salvador
Eritrea***
Estonia
Georgia
Honduras
Hungary
Iceland This doesn’t sound like they are helping with the troops
First of all, this involves flyover authorization for the Icelandic air control area. Secondly, the use of Keflavik Airport, if necessary. In third place, we will take part in the reconstruction of Iraq after the war ends. Fourthly, we expressed political support for Resolution 1441 being enforced after four months of delays."
-- Prime Minister Oddsson, March 18, 2003
Italy
Japan
Latvia
Lithuania Look, again no troops!
"Lithuania's possible contribution to the settlement of the Iraq crisis will be not military but humanitarian participation, aimed at dealing with adverse consequences, by sending doctors, servicing staff and other specialists, as well as by participating in international programs aimed at helping the Iraqi people, including food aid."
-- President Rolandas Paksas, Letter to President George Bush, March 19, 2003
Macedonia
Mongolia
Netherlands
New Zealand
Nicaragua
Panama ***
Philippines
Poland
Portugal
Romania***
Rwanda***
Singapore (Thanks for letting us land at your airport, but how about some troops!)
Singapore is a member of the ‘coalition for the immediate disarmament of Iraq’... Singapore has a memorandum of understanding with the US which was signed in 1990 whereby we allow US aircraft to over fly Singapore and we allow US military assets, ships and aircraft to call at Singapore... It is a matter of grave concern that the Iraqi people do not suffer, and if any measures can be taken to alleviate their suffering, Singapore will do its part.”
-- Deputy Prime Minister Tony Tan, March 21, 2003
Slovakia
South Korea
Spain
Thailand
Turkey But in October 2003, when Turkey later offered to send in 10,000 troops for the effort, the United States turned Ankara down, seeing the potential conflict between the Turks and the Kurds, the coalition’s strongest supporters in Iraq. So I don’t get why they are on the list.
Ukraine
United Kingdom
United States
Uzbekistan***

***(leaving them on for now, they dont have any troops listed in the Fox News Report)

How I Learned to Survive the Bomb

THE PHRASE FOR TODAY, KIDS, IS "COGNITIVE DISSONANCE."

From an article by former Secretary of Defense, Robert S. McNamara:

The destructive power of nuclear weapons is well known, but given the United States’ continued reliance on them, it’s worth remembering the danger they present. A 2000 report by the International Physicians for the Prevention of Nuclear War describes the likely effects of a single 1 megaton weapon—dozens of which are contained in the Russian and U.S. inventories. At ground zero, the explosion creates a crater 300 feet deep and 1,200 feet in diameter. Within one second, the atmosphere itself ignites into a fireball more than a half-mile in diameter. The surface of the fireball radiates nearly three times the light and heat of a comparable area of the surface of the sun, extinguishing in seconds all life below and radiating outward at the speed of light, causing instantaneous severe burns to people within one to three miles. A blast wave of compressed air reaches a distance of three miles in about 12 seconds, flattening factories and commercial buildings. Debris carried by winds of 250 mph inflicts lethal injuries throughout the area. At least 50 percent of people in the area die immediately, prior to any injuries from radiation or the developing firestorm.

Source: http://www.foreignpolicy.com/story/cms.php?story_id=2829

From the Department of Homeland Security and the Your Tax Dollars at Work Department (and, no, this isn't a joke):

IF THERE IS A NUCLEAR BLAST

If there is advanced warning of an attack: Take cover immediately, as far below ground as possible, though any shield or shelter will help protect you from the immediate effects of the blast and the pressure wave.

If there is no warning: Quickly assess the situation.

Consider if you can get out of the area or if it would be better to go inside a building to limit the amount of radioactive material you are exposed to.

If you take shelter go as far below ground as possible, close windows and doors, turn off air conditioners, heaters or other ventilation systems. Stay where you are, watch TV, listen to the radio, or check the Internet for official news as it becomes available.

To limit the amount of radiation you are exposed to, think about shielding, distance and time.

• Shielding: If you have a thick shield between yourself and the radioactive materials more of the radiation will be absorbed, and you will be exposed to less.
• Distance: The farther away you are away from the blast and the fallout the lower your exposure.
• Time: Minimizing time spent exposed will also reduce your risk.

Use available information to assess the situation. If there is a significant radiation threat, health care authorities may or may not advise you to take potassium iodide. Potassium iodide is the same stuff added to your table salt to make it iodized. It may or may not protect your thyroid gland, which is particularly vulnerable, from radioactive iodine exposure. Plan to speak with your health care provider in advance about what makes sense for your family.

Source: http://www.ready.gov/nuclear.html

Kansas or Texas?

I can't decide who is the bigger laughingstock -- Kansas or Texas?

TOPEKA, Kan. (Reuters) - A six-day courtroom-style debate opened on Thursday in Kansas over what children should be taught in schools about the origin of life -- was it natural evolution or did God create the world?

That's the lead. WOW. Where to start? Man, where is HL Mencken when you need him? I guess we should start at the beginning. HAHAHAHA! The beginning -- get it? Okay, I need some sleep.

There is obviously an important misconception about the theory of evolution. Notice what I just wrote -- "the THEORY of evolution." It IS just a theory, and whether or not you agree with it is bascially determined by whether or not you believe millions of years of fossil records (for example: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/sci/tech/4498049.stm, or if you believe that a white guy with a white beard made the Earth in 7 days. I report, you decide.

Charles Darwin may have laid out the particulars of evolution in THE ORIGIN OF SPECIES, but the first critical debate about "the origin of life" can be found in the works of the pre-Socratic philosopher Anaximander and, of course, THE Philosopher, Aristotle. It is interesting to note that Aristotle rejected the central tenants of evolution that Anaximander layed out. A fascinating overview of Aristotle's views can be found here: http://www.d.umn.edu/~aroos/HTML9/index.html. Conservatives -- do not be afraid. There are lots of big colorful pictures to get you past the two + syllable words. It is also interesting to note that Aristotle thought the brain was a cooling system for the blood. The point: even geniuses can be wrong, and in this case over two thousands years of scientific advances support Anaximander.

Anaximander lived c. 610-546 Before the Christian Era, which means the foundations of the theory of evolution were built years before Christianity came along. Thus, "creationism," which is little more than a theory built on faith rather than measurable evidence, was built long after a vigorous debate about evolution had already taken place. The idea coming out of Kansas -- and thus conservative religious circles -- is that there is a bias against religion in the schools and creationism and/or intelligent design should have an equal place in our curriculum. This is absurd. Religion is, by definition, an article of faith. Faith can be defined as an absence of evidence which disqualifies it from ever rising to the level of a scientific theory, evidence being something which, I hope we all agree, is necessary to support a theory.

If you put stickers on science books that say EVOLUTION IS A THEORY, then we should be prepared to put stickers in the front of Bibles that says CREATIONISM IS FAITH. The silliest part about what is going on in Kansas is the naive belief that if somehow evolution is demoted to faith, or faith is promoted to scientific theory, then the Christian origin of life somehow becomes fact. If that were possible religion would be science, not an article of faith.

Regardless of what is taught in our schools, one thing will remain unchanged: in 2005 After the Death of Christ, neither the theory of evolution nor creationism can be proven beyond doubt. As the saying goes: only the dead have the answers. So, should we expunge everything we've learned from Anaximander to Darwin just so a bunch of religious fanatics in Kansas can feel better on their deathbeds? Should we tear down the wall that seperates church and state, religion and science, faith and theory? I say YES if our goal is to create a system of American madrassas that rival anything you would find in Pakistan. I say NO if our goal is to produce well educated, critical thinking, citizens whose knowledge and skills put to shame the best the rest of the world has to offer.

That is the goal, isn't it?

CLINTON DID IT!

This just in from the blogsphere:

A Baptist Church in Waynesville, NC, which is in the mountains near the Tennessee border, has just expelled 9 members of their congregation for being Democrats and not voting for Bush. 40 others walked out of the Church in protest of the action, but most stood up and applauded when they were told they were no longer welcome. The congregation numbers 405 people. A video of the televison report can be found on Hoffmania:

http://www.hoffmania.com/blog/2005/05/its_true.html

Republicans to Military Veterans -- SCREW YOU!

I know conservatives are missing the part of the brain that processes facts (in cases when a brain can be medically proven to exist). That is why they all scream the same talking points like a bunch of sheep. "Why do liberals hate America?" "Blame America First." Blah, blah, blah, boring, boring, can I hear your dumb phrases that you've lifted from Rush one more time without ramming a sewing needle through my head? Here is yet another piece of actual evidence -- you know, the "real" kind that is an undisputed fact no matter how many nauseauting right wing "think tanks" come out to perfect their art of proving themselves right no matter how wrong they are. Once again, the Republicans, who pretty much centered their entire 2004 election campaign around being THE party that supports the military even though most them never served, have given a resounding SCREW YOU to the military veterans of this country. Below, the latest. Anyone notice all those "Rs" in the NAY column? I look forward to tossing my lunch after hearing how the "America First" support group will spin this one:

U.S. Senate Roll Call Votes 109th Congress - 1st Session as compiled through Senate LIS by the Senate Bill Clerk under the direction of the Secretary of the Senate Vote Summary uestion: On the Motion (Motion to Waive Sec. 402, S. Con. Res. 95 (108th) "Emergency designation" Re: Murray Amdt. No. 344, As Modified ) Vote Number: 89 Vote Date: April 12, 2005, 03:26 PM Required For Majority: 3/5 Amendment Number: S.Amdt. 344 to to H.R. 1268 (Emergency Supplemental Appropriations Act for Defense, the Global War on Terror, and Tsunami Relief, 2005 )

Statement of Purpose: To provide $1,975,183,000 for medical care for veterans.
Vote Result: Motion Rejected

ALL DEMOCRATS VOTED YES Grouped By Vote Position YEAs ---46 Akaka (D-HI) Baucus (D-MT) Bayh (D-IN) Biden (D-DE) Bingaman (D-NM) Boxer (D-CA) Byrd (D-WV) Cantwell (D-WA) Carper (D-DE) Clinton (D-NY) Conrad (D-ND) Corzine (D-NJ) Dayton (D-MN) Dodd (D-CT) Dorgan (D-ND) Durbin (D-IL) Feingold (D-WI) Feinstein (D-CA) Harkin (D-IA) Inouye (D-HI) Jeffords (I-VT) Johnson (D-SD) Kennedy (D-MA) Kerry (D-MA) Kohl (D-WI) Landrieu (D-LA) Lautenberg (D-NJ) Leahy (D-VT) Levin (D-MI) Lieberman (D-CT) Lincoln (D-AR) Mikulski (D-MD) Murray (D-WA) Nelson (D-FL) Nelson (D-NE) Obama (D-IL) Pryor (D-AR) Reed (D-RI) Reid (D-NV) Rockefeller (D-WV) Salazar (D-CO) Sarbanes (D-MD) Schumer (D-NY) Specter (R-PA) only republican to vote yes Stabenow (D-MI) Wyden (D-OR)

ALL REPUBLICANS VOTED NO MONEY FOR VETS HEALTHCARE...NAYs ---54 Alexander (R-TN) Allard (R-CO) Allen (R-VA) Bennett (R-UT) Bond (R-MO) Brownback (R-KS) Bunning (R-KY) Burns (R-MT) Burr (R-NC) Chafee (R-RI) Chambliss (R-GA) Coburn (R-OK) Cochran (R-MS) Coleman (R-MN) Collins (R-ME) Cornyn (R-TX) Craig (R-ID) Crapo (R-ID) DeMint (R-SC) DeWine (R-OH) Dole (R-NC) Domenici (R-NM) Ensign (R-NV) Enzi (R-WY) Frist (R-TN) Graham (R-SC) Grassley (R-IA) Gregg (R-NH) Hagel (R-NE) Hatch (R-UT) Hutchison (R-TX) Inhofe (R-OK) Isakson (R-GA) Kyl (R-AZ) Lott (R-MS) Lugar (R-IN) Martinez (R-FL) McCain (R-AZ) McConnell (R-KY) Murkowski (R-AK) Roberts (R-KS) Santorum (R-PA) Sessions (R-AL) Shelby (R-AL) Smith (R-OR) CALL YOUR SENATORS AND Snowe (R-ME) NEWSPAPERS AND TV NOW. Stevens (R-AK) DEMAND AN ANSWER. Sununu (R-NH) Talent (R-MO) Thomas (R-WY) Thune (R-SD) Vitter (R-LA) Voinovich (R-OH) Warner (R-VA)

COUP FOR THE CRACKPOT PRESS!!!!

Frank Modesto (see below) has shunned his relationship with The San Francsico Chronicle and all other MSM and has contacted a member of the Crackpot Press for an interview.

Frank is claiming that he recieved a call from Hunter Thomspon the night before his "suicide", which will shed new light on his death. He will also be talking about his 30 year disappearance and why he has decided to return to activism.

Part one of the interview will be running on www.crackpotpress.com starting on Saturday.

We got spirit!

Let's see how Texas Republicans are wasting tax payer money today.

Let's Regulate High School Cheerleading! Yes, really! Thank God we got all the importan issues out the way, so we can work on some fine tuning!

http://apnews.myway.com/article/20050504/D89SD1300.html
Next week a debate on "What is Sexy?"

So help me god if they lay a finger (that isn't mine) on the Coors Light twins or that chick from GoDaddy.com...

Missing Activist is ALIVE!

The San Francisco Chronicle reported today that Frank Modesto, a HUGE activist in the early 70's is, in fact, ALIVE. Frank Modesto was reported missing in October 1976. From most accounts it was originally assumed that he had been murdered or abducted. There was even a theory that he had jumped off of the Bay Bridge.

Frank Modesto was one of the founders and spokesmen for the Progressive People's Peace Army, a liberal activist group. It was reported that he had ties to Mario Savio's "Free Speech Movement, " the Black Panthers (there is a rumor that he had an affair with Angela Davis)
and even the Mob.

Story Devloping.......