Friday, October 28, 2005

Why Chicks Who Dig Sports Rock.

Why Chicks Who Dig Sports Rock!

I got into a conversation with a platonic female friend the other night. She had been doing some internet dating and it seems the guys she would browse all wanted a girl who was into sports; a Requirement. She wanted to know why. So now I am telling.

1. Low Maintenance… For beginners You understand “No Bullshit Shopping Trips” in the Post Season.

2. You understand that ALL sports bars have hot waitresses. I will occasionally gawk and I know, that while you won’t admit it, you are staring Tom Brady’s ass. We understand each other. You know I am going home with you.

3. You know the appropriate time to make funky noises.

4. You understand that competition should be on the field. Not in the bedroom… unless it’s a 3-way. In that case, knock yourself out.

5. You plan Thanksgiving dinner at an appropriate time. I’ll have the bird ready.

6. You look hot in a Jersey, especially mine. I don’t care how cute you thought those shoes were…a jersey will bring a boy down.

7. It is sexy when you bring me a beer during the game. Almost equally sexy: If I go to the fridge for a beer and you say “Honey, while you’re up?”

8. Choosing a team is a commitment; Even if it’s the evil, evil Yankees or Cowboys. If I can keep the peace with you, you who roots against me, you are a keeper.

9. You can order appropriately from a Sports Bar Menu without making a scene (i.e. Bitching about “no tofurkey”). You love the shrimp at Hooters.

10.You make me watch Tennis; I make you watch the AVP. Everybody wins.

11. You know the importance of the “Thrill of Victory, Agony of Defeat” Blowjob. It's the only way to cure a broken heart. It's the best way to celebrate a victory.

12. I don’t come home drunk after a night of watching sports with the boys. WE come home drunk after a night of watching sports with the boys.

13. Cooperstown is an appropriate vacation destination.

14. When my team loses, you call me “ A bitch.” (except in the post season) When your team loses… I find a different adjective, like “Sugar” or “Sweet Pea” and see the opposite of Rule 11.

15. You can hang in the nosebleeds.

16. You told me that Janet’s boob fell out. I missed it. Yeah, you were watching Justin’s ass.

In short, you rock!


totolehero said...

great post !!!
makes me wanna be a "chick who dig sports"...

us canadians are only into hockey..., but since i'm korean, and not entirely canadian, i don't really dig the whole hockey fiasco... BUT i soooo dig soccer.. does that count ?? hehehhe

during the world cup, the morning korea won against the italian, i opened my window and shouted for all to hear... just forgot that it was 4 in the morning....

now that's dedication to a team !!

Crackpot Press said...

Soccer can long rule #11 is strictly adhered to.

In 2001, I lived in an apartment building that was predominately Latino.

I woke up at 4:00 and the am and couldn't sleep.

I went for a walk and everyone was up and their TV's were on. I thought it was another terrorist attack.

Nope just World Cup Soccer.

Penny said...

Great Post! I like the equality!