Friday, January 30, 2009

Fortune Don't Know Shit or Is It Me That Don't Know Shit


Went to the library and read this article from Fortune “Like Your Job? Keep it!” The article explains how to save your own hide in case layoffs are coming. Now regardless that I did most of the things in this article, I still lost my gig.

Let’s review with my real world experience:

DO take credit... but don't "walk around with a big neon sign that says I'M GREAT,” I did this. However, the tattooed in a promising local band jackass from the design department who boasted about his work while lambasting others still works there. Perhaps the shrill of the squeakiest wheel caught the ear of the boss.

DO volunteer for more work.
WRONG! I took on many more responsibilities without being compensated. All of those “not my jobbers” still work there. If you take on additional responsibilities for free, you are being a sucker and will soon become undervalued. And then you will:

DO arrive early and stay late.
No, because I volunteered for more work I had to come in early and stay late. This made my boss believe I couldn’t handle to workload.

DON'T be eccentric.
BUT of you are in a workplace that is ALREADY eccentric the square still looks like a square.

DON'T be high maintenance.
The art department divas were EXTREMELY high maintenance, blaming blown deadlines on “I’m artist… I need to create… I’m going on a burrito run.” Divas: 1 Dave 0.

Then I began to think. How can FORTUNE, one of the kingpins of business journals be so far flung off their rocker wrong? Companies profits zoom if included in the Fortune 500. Fortune's "Best Companies To Work For" get pummeled with resumes. This isn't the TMZ of finance, this is the gold standard.

At this point I had a great epiphany: I was just at a fucked up company.

Perhaps my boss is the grand nincompoop that I always suspected he was? Maybe it was one of the situations where “It’s not you, it’s me” really does apply? I'm not one to bash the hand that used to feed me and let me go a week before Xmas with no severance. I do however, have a talent for the truth.

After all, as this article shows, there are exceptions to every rule. SO I am off to fill out some job applications at THESE PLACES!