Jamie Masada is fucking asshole.

Jamie Masada has banned the word "nigger" from the Laugh Factory at the Sunset Strip.

Think about it.

Crackpot Press Special Guest

On Monday or perhaps Tuesday Crackpot Press will welcome a very special Guest Crackpot..

The world's one and only...

MOJO NIXON!!!

Mojo will be talking to us about his two new shows on Sirius, the Death of Nasville and Barbara Bush's clit.

Hmmm Mojo Nixon talkin politixin... what would be the best name of that show?

CLICK HERE TO FIND OUT AND LISTEN

Gem from the Dollar Bin

SUN CITY - ARTISTS UNITED AGAINST APARTHEID

This is the Holy Grail of the Dollar Bin. For years, I have been looking for this on Amazon, E-Bay and troll-lurking used record stores. Shit, finding the image on Google was a bitch. Released in 1986, this was the antidote for the touchy feely “We Are The World.”

In 1985 someone in Sperry topsiders invited me to an Anti-Apatheid Rally in East St. Louis. Being from California, I assumed it was some Cesar Chavez save the farmer’s kind of thing.

Yes, I assumed Apartheid was something our government was spraying on poor farmers.

I was right.

Of course, Apartheid was the repression of the black majority in South Africa.

Unlike ‘We Are the World” there was no gutless music and lyrics (Sorry Quincy) . Rather
than the ultra positive, “We Are the World” that spawned countless self-important
imitiations; Sun City was tough, simple and poignant. Unlike, “We Are The World” it
actually invited artists FROM Africa to participate. Written by Little Steven (for the Old
Folks: the guy with bandanna from the “E-Street Band,” for the young ... he was on the
Sopranos”) the lyrics are straight to the stiletto point.


"We ain’t gonna play Sun City."

In a Reagan world where Rap was a New Ghetto Thang and the Punk had been reduced
to a haircut, the ragtag Run DMC, Lou Reed, Bruce Springsteen, Joey Ramone, Afrika
Bambaattaa, Miles Davis, Pete Townsend, George Clinton and Jimmy Cliff made a united
front. A bunch of guys who, at that time, weren’t even allowed to share the same chart on
the back page of Rolling Stone. A young suburban kid got the message and felt some of
the pain. It was the first time for me that rap meant more than grabbing your dick.

A group protest song that was not something to listen to. It was something to get angry
about.

I tried to impress girls with my sensitivity with “We Are the World”

I needed to get something done when I heard “Sun City”

To this day, it is the only “Mega artist” collaboration that was a part of eliminating the
problem. It raised my awareness. I became a part of it.

I am sure there is still racism, but there is no more apartheid. Farm-Aid is still around.
People are still starving in Africa. AIDS is still available.

Guess that’s why the album is so hard to find.

and it was in the fucking dollar bin.

I just braved the 95 Degrees here in Studio City California to go vote. I just realized a friend of mine from high school is running for my congressional district on the Green Party. Odd because we both went to highschool in St. Louis. So if you are the Mighty 28th district, Vote for Byron Delear and send Howard Berman packing. He's one of "them"

Naturally I wanted to see how my pal was doing, so I check the the local Fox11.com website.

First of all they don't list Green Party Candidates. However more shocking is that FOX has already proclaimed Richard Mountjoy (R) defeating DIANE FEINSTEIN???

Click on the picture of California.

Also John Jones (R) has defeated Mike Thompson (D) in District one

WTF?

Look I think we all know that Fox News has never truly been on the up and up... but this takes the cake... the polls don't even close for 8 and half freaking hours.

I guess FOX news is really done pretending.

Special Guest Crackpot

Hey I was cleaning out the Crackpot Press submissions folder and I ran across this bit that was submitted to me.

Also I rant on Aaron Sorkin and Greg talks about delicate surgery.

Check it out!

Josh Jennings won't touch your kids.

VOTE JENNINGS!

In California? Don't Know how to Vote?

Crackpot Press recommends this site

Go to the Main Site

New Look, new stuff over on the main site...

The Giant Robot Interview
The Return of Daze Strange
Agitating the Sleep
Me, on the Gays
Half Remembered Reviews
The Crappy Gig
The Flight to Brindisi

and a whollatta other crap.

check 'er out

Spelling and Such

I stumbled across this "I Hate Murtha" site.

Why do I half a harde tyme takeng theese folks seriouslee?

Today's Spin

So the moderates shut down the right wing....

Remember the right wing.. they are the opposite of us pot smokin' Benny Hill watchin' masturbating types...


So the moderates, facing Career nihilation... have finally decided to re-define POPULAR!!!!!!

But it is funny what the right wing blogs are running for their news...

Cos... they got nuthin'.. and as Gershwin said.. "Plenty O'" it. Yet I had $12.59 on the 2006 summer temps.... DAMMMIT!!!!
They are obviously trying to alienate us POPEYE fans...



What will they do next?

Texans.

In case you have forgotton, this is what a REAL TEXAN does.



Still can't believe that Texans are still falling for the New England Yankee.

COme to think of it... did Bush ever get diction lessons for that Twang?

Coincidence? I think not...

Hmmm....

I think that mainstream America may be waking up.

First I go over to Media Matters where they have this report . Or if you wanna cheat it's just gauging that since Katie Couric (Delta, Delta, Delta, can I help ya? help ya? help ya?) has taken over at CBS news the right wing guests far out number the left leaning guests.

Then I was checking the Drudge report where they post this little bit on Katie's ratings... going in the toilet.

Coincidence? It looks like CBS is throwing a bone to the right over that whole forged memo thing...

But could it be that the right wing cotton gin is losing some steam?

Are the great undecided.... making a decision to check out the latest syndicated 1/2 hours? A little VOD maybe.. people working later?

Or maybe it's her hair... or maybe people don't yet take cutey Katie seriously

Battle for the Ages

The best Pro Beach Volleyball match of the year.. Once Champion Partners, now bitter enemies.. Rachel Wacholder takes on Elaine YOungs for the first time.

Hey Folks!

So I looked at this and I haven't done anything new in weeks!

I have been working on the new Crackpot Press site

Still healing but I am getting some feeling back in my right hand.

Also I offer up the first piece THE ONION did after 9-11.

It's one of the best pieces of satire writing I have ever read.

People need the HOBO CODE

I stumbled upon this recently.

I thiknk we should all stand by this.

This Hobo Code.

s inscribed in the Annual Convention Congress of the Hoboes of America held on August 8, 1894 at the Hotel Alden, 917 Market St., Chicago Illinois;

1.-Decide your own life, don't let another person run or rule you.

2.-When in town, always respect the local law and officials, and try to be a gentleman at all times.

3.-Don't take advantage of someone who is in a vulnerable situation, locals or other hobos.

4.-Always try to find work, even if temporary, and always seek out jobs nobody wants. By doing so you not only help a business along, but insure employment should you return to that town again.

5.-When no employment is available, make your own work by using your added talents at crafts.

6.-Do not allow yourself to become a stupid drunk and set a bad example for locals treatment of other hobos.

7.-When jungling in town, respect handouts, do not wear them out, another hobo will be coming along who will need them as bad, if not worse than you.

8.-Always respect nature, do not leave garbage where you are jungling.

9.-If in a community jungle, always pitch in and help.

10.-Try to stay clean, and boil up wherever possible.

11.-When traveling, ride your train respectfully, take no personal chances, cause no problems with the operating crew or host railroad, act like an extra crew member.

12.-Do not cause problems in a train yard, Another hobo will be coming along who will need passage thru that yard.

13.-Do not allow other hobos to molest children, expose to authorities all molesters, they are the worst garbage to infest any society.

14.-Help all runaway children, and try to induce them to return home.

15.-Help your fellow hobos whenever and wherever needed, you may need their help someday.

16.-If present at a hobo court and you have testimony, give it, whether for or against the accused, your voice counts

Library Smut

I came across porn for REAL (dare I say, "HARDCORE") NERDS.

Where do we go NOWOWOWOW.

I know the boomer's, as usual, have been grabbin the headlines.

Paul McCartney.. Goldie Hawn on the cover of the AARP mag.

Discussing the death of Bruno Kirby...Giles Weaver and I got into a conversation about the movie "When Harry Met Sally" ("You made a woman MEOW??"...brilliant )

I told Giles that I caught the flick on cable recently and it didn't mean as much to me, now that we are older than the characters involved. He didn't buy it. "THOSE ARE OLD PEOPLE"

The "Harry Met Sally" people are older than us.

As a nineteen year old kid, getting high off of Diane.. it meant something. These old people and their problems. In retrospect... We would be blessed to have their problems. We would also be blessed to have the "problems" of the characters in "THE BIG CHILL" who we are now also older than. Your worst problem is that you had an affair and your estranged friend killed himself... bummer...

These characters seemed like a bunch of yuppies that had a bad divorce or breakup.... BUMMER!

The folks I know..... these "Harry and Sally" people have have as much impact on my life as the 90210 kids.

People I don't know. People who have never lost a job. People who have never lost a friend prematurely.. It's the life we wished we had.

Fucking Boomers...



Boomers.. it' s time for your last chance hangover mass...

What are you gonna do? What is your legacy?

Oh and by the way... the average age of the college fresman... was born the year this song came out....




Gen X... time to make your mark.

Work on that.

I know you have responsibilities....

But what are you up for?

So beezaree I watched it four times.

It gets better after the initial.

Those Wacky Snakes.

I won't spoil this flick at all. However, I was surprised at the smaller (yet extremely enthusiastic) crowd at the Mann's Bruin in the heart of Westwood last night.

The entrie crowd chanted along, making hissing sounds (even through the trailers) and the entire crowd chanting along with the no famous line. As a note my girlfriend refused to watch any clips of the movie prior to seeing it. Especially the now famous line.

Why?

"It would be like seeing the bride before the wedding."

However, I really think Kirk Honeycutt's review from The Hollywood Reporter really sums it up:

This represents a kind of entertainment genius along the lines of fun houses, roller coasters and tricks those Thai hookers perform with razor blades and soda bottles in Bangkok sex shows.

Well, done Kirk! Now THAT’S a flick I want to check out!

You don't get it?

Sam Jackson on the Daily Show. I called a friend yesterday to invite him and his gal to join CPG and myself tonight at the Bruin.

"I have no interest. I don't get it."

SNAKES. PLANE. SAM. WHAT IS THERE NOT TO GET?????